Four Great Picturebooks Dealing with Death

Death is that most sensitive of subjects, and a particularly confusing one for children, too. If you ever need to talk to a young child about death, or if someone close to them has died, then maybe one of these books can help. I'll admit that story-wise, I've never gone deeper with my kids than Judith Kerr's Goodbye Mog, which will bring a smile to your face, and a tear to your eye. The four books below may well do that and more, but are told mainly from the point of view of those left behind (unlike Mog). They're accessible and tender introductions to the theme of death.

Grandma's Gloves, by Cecil Castelucci and Julia Denos

A young girl loves spending time with her Grandma: getting squirted by the hose, drinking jasmine tea, but most of all, gardening. Grandma is teaching the girl everything she knows about gardening, when she takes ill and dies. After the funeral, no one but the girl notices that Grandma's plants are wilting. She realises that she can teach her Mum about gardening, just as Grandma taught her.

This story is beautiful, both in words and picture - lovely coloured sketchwork that you don't seem to see so much anymore. It's incidentally the only story out of the four that features humans dying, rather than animals. It's very much set in the real world, but is infused with warmth and hope.

Heaven, by Nicholas Allan

Lily's dog Dill has packed his suitcase for a very long trip - and it's one that Lily can't go on just yet. But what is it like in Heaven? Lily's idea is of rollercoasters and sweets, but Dill is sure Heaven is full of bones and lampposts and smells. Lily misses Dill terribly, but she later befriends a stray puppy, filling his life with bones and lampposts and smells. As Dill reflects from his cloud up above, he must think he's in Heaven already!

This is certainly the most humourous of the four (Nicholas Allan is the author of The Queen's Knickers and Cinderella's Bum,so that's perhaps to be expected), but is wise, moving, and thought-provoking just the same.

Always and Forever, by Alan Durant and Debi Gliori

Otter, Mole, Fox and Hare live together as a family in their house inside a tree. Fox is very much the father of the little family, and when he dies a gloom settles over the others, like the snow outside. Even talking about the good times just hurts too much. But as Spring arrives and the snow melts, Squirrel visits them, and helps pick them back up. He helps them remember and laugh at funny, silly memories of Fox - the time he built a chair, which broke straight away; the time he did the weeding, but dig up the carrots instead; the time he baked a pie and burned it all. This lightens their spirits and brings healing to them. They decide to honour and enjoy Fox's memory by building a new garden bench, planting more carrots and baking a pie.

Debi Gliori's illustrations are always a pleasure and very child-friendly, but this book deals with the lingering, debilitating effects that grief can have if left unchecked. Yet despite that, even in its darkest times, it is never too despairing for most children, and shows that joy can return.

Badger's Parting Gifts by Susan Varley

This picturebook classic is still Susan Varley's best-known book, though it was written way back in 1984. It looks at first glance like a Wind in the Willows type of story; and indeed it is - until Badger dies. Badger finds himself walking down the Long Tunnel: slowly with his stick at first, and then running, as the strength returns to his old legs. But all his friends know is that their friend is dead and gone, and will be with them no more. In time, each of them are able to recognise a strength or skill that they have, which Badger helped them to develop - the "parting gifts" of the title. Making use of those gifts both honours Badger and helps each other.

It's not hard to see why this book is so well loved, and both the text and artwork have a style to them not often seen in newer releases. This book (as with Heaven) will comfort the young reader by lingering slightly on the dying beloved before returning to the bereaved friends. Badger's run is as lovely an image is you could hope for.

***

I'm struck in reviewing these four books together that although they are each different, they have a common theme: remembering the deceased, and making use of what they have taught you. This way, we honour our friend, and bring something of them into ours and others' lives. I hope that one of these books can be helpful and a comfort if ever you need them.